In Search of Lost and Forgotten Memories

How is it that some of us so clearly remember memories from the earliest years of life on this earth while the rest of us struggle in vain to find a shred of anything that would awaken those sleeping beauties and bring them to the surface to let us to rejoice in?

I have been aching to remember my childhood in more depth and detail. Why the yearning and why now, I wish I knew. All I know is that I “rank at the bottom of the class” while my girlfriends remember vivid details of our days in Iran. A Los Angeles reunion after 26 years proved this and for the life of me, I cannot shake it off. Whatever happened to my beautiful memories?

“How can you not remember this incident or that person?“

Believe me, it’s not for lack of trying or desire. Or being a forgetful person in any way shape or form.

I never thought I would feel envious of someone with more memories and better recollection of their childhood than me but I really do. What an odd and strange case of jealousy! I approach envy and jealousy with extreme caution in my life; I know from experience that no goodness stems from either emotion and in fact, unnecessary harm to oneself is their outcome at best. As young adults, we naturally experience all spectrum of emotions but in the process of maturing, we learn to recognize and filter the good from the not-so-good. Living a life free of all jealousy and envy has been my motto and it just so turns out that there is no happiness above wanting what you have rather than wanting what you lack.

In all fun and irony, here I am, returning from a trip to Beverly Hills, a place which stirs a wish list as long and wide as Rodeo drive for most people and yet my deepest desire right now is to be flooded with memories of my early childhood and school years in Iran before leaving. I want so much to remember random incidents, significant events, sweet conversations, my teachers and my class mates, the games at birthday parties and the mid-morning breaks in the school courtyard, and every excruciating detail around the first and the last time I saw my best friends.

If only we could be a butterfly on those walls. If only we could relive our childhood just one more time. If only we could have one day back to remember to save and savor every memory for this day. If only time would afford us such sweet act of kindness once in our lifetime. Oh what I would do with that chance, how I would exploit it to bits and pieces, how I would submit to paper (or to my genius iPhone!) every memory. How I would save every scrap of paper, every sticker, every gift from my friends, every photo (despite the atrocious photo quality of the 1980s!), every school book and every single notebook my little pencil ever touched.

But alas, it is not to be. We only move forward in this time and space and for some of us, our memories are as fleeting and unreachable as the past itself. The more we reach out to touch them, caress them and hold on to them, the more they scape into oblivion. Yet if the Heavens were to grant me any wish, I’d ask that they give me back my lost memories of those precious days, for I cannot for the life of me find them or if they lie dormant, I cannot seem to awaken them.

This is in all likeliness the most inquisitive post I shall write here in Prolific Living. So forgive the long list of questions in advance, I have less to offer here than you my dear readers. If there is only one post in all of this blog on which you choose to share your thoughts, let it be this one. Pick any question, any mix of questions or all of them and help ease my sorrow of my forgotten memories with your thoughts, opinions, knowledge, and words. I await your answers with bated breath (the Shakespearean spelling, I checked!)……thank you!

1. As human beings, do we really retain all our memories from a certain childhood age somewhere, somehow?
2. If we do retain all the memories, then they must go dormant after a while. How can we awaken them, especially if the usual tangible reminders do not bring back anything? What if any are the safe ways to access the recesses of our mind?
3. If we don’t retain them, then what are the memory patterns and the deciding factors for what one person remembers versus another?
4. If we have intention and desire to forget an event or a series of events, and if constantly reminded of this intention, is it really possible to make our brain forget and “discard” a memory?
5. In cases where we remember a long forgotten memory, how can we ensure its safe and new residence among our brain cells?
6. Does hypnosis help revive old and forgotten memories? (No I am not thinking about it, just curious!)
7. How do you fill the void of not having many tangibles from your childhood? Is the lack of material objects related to the loss of their associated memories?
   
8. What are some of your earliest memories, being careful to distinguish between events where a person has recounted a story for you and those where you actually remember?